World of Babycraft

– Posted in: Diaper Disaster, Grosser than Gross, Poop, Pregnancy, Worst Mom Moments

Ever wonder what the deal is with people who play computer games online? Ludicrous Mama of Biting the Hand That Feeds You is letting us peak behind the curtain. And you thought triathletes and Justin Bieber fans were hardcore. . .



I prefer to think of this as being a responsible (online) friend, rather than a bad Mommy.

Before getting pregnant, I was a gamer. I mostly played computer games, especially World of Warcraft, but still the occasional card game or role-playing game. Plus board games. It kind of becomes work though, when one’s husband is a game designer. At 7-months pregnant, I was put on disability leave, since I was dilating early and had a job where I needed to be on my feet all day. {Wheeee!} So I played Warcraft. . . a lot!

In case you aren’t familiar with the game, or with MMOPRGs (Massive multi-player online role-playing games), this one is a fantasy setting game with monsters to fight and dungeons (lairs, keeps, etc.) to fight in and such. The game runs the monsters, but each of the fighters or characters is played by a real person somewhere. So several people group their characters up and play together to help each other out, or to do the harder things, like dungeons. And there are different kinds of characters. Warriors (who try and keep the monsters off everyone else), healers (who keep the warrior alive), and magic users and other high-damage-output characters, to defeat the monsters while the “tank” is keeping their attention all on him.

Okay. Background over. After two months of contractions (and dilating to 5 cm!) I was sitting there minding my own business, playing my healer in a dungeon. I was grouped with my husband’s character and our friend’s character. Then. . . Uh-oh. Okay. . . let’s look at the clock. Write down the time. Okay. Fight fight fight. Heal heal. . . Okay, it stopped. Write down the time again. Five minutes. Heal heal. Ooo. . . write down the time. . . okay. . . seven minutes. Fight fight, heal heal. . . etc.

That’s right. I timed my contractions in-between fighting the big monsters (or “boss mobs”). And finished the dungeon before telling anyone. I take my role as the group’s healer very seriously! (Although my husband should have gotten a clue when I’d start asking him what time it was, when I didn’t have he opportunity to even glance down at the clock on the computer while in a monster fight.)

So a short while later, I’m home alone with a newborn. Who fits perfectly on the Boppy. . . at my computer desk. It must have been at least a month after she was born since my husband was home the first few weeks, and after that I just remember being a blob in bed for a while, eating whatever my husband had left for me each morning and only getting up to pee or wash my breast pump.

So now I’m playing Warcraft with my precious little bundle laying like a slug an angel on the Boppy in my lap, and my character is in a group with my friend and three other guys we’d played with online before, but didn’t know in real life. We were doing a dungeon I had never done before, and there was a quest to get to the end of the dungeon and defeat the final boss before a time limit ran out. So we gave it a shot.

Just as our characters are crossing the bridge to enter the final boss’s room, I hear this: Spppbplbplbpbpblbplbpt!
. . . And feel a wet, gooey warmth spreading all over my torso. Yes. I was covered in poo. Did I jump up and change my baby? No. I sat there, both of us wallowing in liqui-poo. . . and finished the boss fight (We won. Within the time limit! Boo-yaw!).

Afterwards, when I was changing (I just went directly into our shower stall to strip down), there was poo on my shirt and pants, but also in my bra and granny panties underwear. Bleah.

Just for the record — while she has pooped and peed and had many a leaky diaper on Mommy, she has never peed or pooped on Daddy. The bastard.

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8 Comments… add one

Alison May 7, 2011, 1:39 am

LOL I do love my a poop story. Sorry, I mean, gamer story. :-)

Kylin May 7, 2011, 8:21 am

Great post, Kendra! Seems like an ideal way to get through early labor to me : )

mominrome May 7, 2011, 10:42 am

ahhahahah!!!

Dad has always more luck…WTF !!!!!!!

World's Worst Moms May 7, 2011, 7:40 pm

I'm personally just happy to finally find out what World of Warcraft is all about. And now, of course, I'll never be able to talk to anyone about it without thinking of labor and exploding diapers. Always good to have your reference points.

Super May 9, 2011, 11:38 am

Out of curiosity… Horde or Alliance? lol

Ludicrous Mama May 9, 2011, 12:44 pm

Horde. I initially played Alliance until my husband turned to the dark side… it's much easier to play a healer if you have a buddy to kill the monsters for you!

IncidentalDomestic May 9, 2011, 7:27 pm

LOL!! Hilarious!!!! I had similar moments, except it was sending out emails and finishing up some web updates for clients — or processing Ebay orders. (In spite of that, while I was in labor in the room, between contractions I was barking orders to my very patient husband who was closing all my ebay listings one at a time, as I had forgotten to do that. But that's what laptops are for!! :D :D :D )

When I knew it was the real thing and I had mentioned to my neighbor that I was in labor and was going to be going to the hospital soon, she actually called several times to tell me that if I didn't get off the computer and get to the hospital, I was going to end up having a home birth.

Almost done. just … one … more …. email …..

-Jennifer P.

:)

Kathy May 11, 2011, 5:03 am

This is just great! I love this post!! And I love this site, to think that I've been a bad mommy my whole carrer and never had a place to share it! Lol! I found your site on Mom in Rome, and I am so glad I did!

Ludicrous Mom, this is just priceless!!! I have never been a gamer but I can completly relate in getting caught up in other things such as my gardening or in my blogging. A few months ago my youngest son who was 5 at the time, stubbed his toe. He came over to where I was working and I gave him my special mommy hug and kiss. When he wanted a bandaid for the noexistant cut I put him off a few times with a “One minute honey” afterall I was in the middle of checking on comments to a post, I didn't have time to give a bandaid to a nonexistant cut. After hearing one to many “one more minute honeys” he decided to take matters into his own hands. “Mommy, see you later, I'm going to the nurse!” He went into the bathroom and I of course meekly followed!!! Thanks for making me laugh!! I will now go to your site!

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