Comic Relief: F-ing Shut Up

– Posted in: Illustrated by Me, Kid Friends, Mouths of Babes, Okay That's Funny, Worst Mom Moments

So the kids, Newt and Elfie, are at a little camp this week, and today they came home with a story for which words could not do justice. I’ve been messing around with an app called Paper by Fifty Three on the iPad (I’m sure all of you cool people already know all about it — I’m just slow), and I’ve been having such a good time that I decided to present the tale in comic form…

F-ing Shut Up Cartoon

F-ing Shut Up Cartoon

F-ing Shut Up Cartoon

F-ing Shut Up Cartoon

Okay, so truth be told, it didn’t exactly go down like that. Apparently Elfie was playing a game, and a little boy got teed off at her and started hurling insults. She took them for as long as she could (apparently told him to stop multiple times and said he was being “unacceptable”), but he wouldn’t knock it off. So she finally dropped the “S” bomb.

This led to the tattling moment. Not a big deal. So later, Newt is apparently minding his own business when the little boy comes up and starts messing with his art project. Newt tells him, multiple times, to knock it off. Tells him he’s being “disrespectful” (I love my kids’ vocabulary). The kid won’t back down. So Newt gives him a shove. And the kid says, “You f*cking!”

This completely upsets Newt. He’s totally shocked and offended (not because he’s never heard the f-word before — he’s just never been called the f-word before). So when my husband, Tenzin, picks them up, and they tell him the whole story, it’s big drama. That is, until Tenzin points out the irony of the situation. And tells them the story of how Newt used to pronounce the tr in “truck” like an “f”.

Then of course everyone thinks it’s hysterical, makes up this cartoon, and uses it as an excuse to drop f-bombs all evening while “recalling” the story.

So there you have it. The story of the comic. Hopefully the little boy didn’t get into too much trucking fouble.

22 Comments… add one

vanita August 9, 2013, 3:59 am

i die. you kill me. i once worked with someone who had such an accent that when he said beach, the ea sounded like the i in pig. one summer the company planned an employee day at the beach. he had a ball with that. it got to the point that i would laugh every time he walked into a room because i knew what was coming. i envy you having paper. i would kill for an ipad just to use paper man.
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Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:58 am

You’d almost be required to do a beach day or beach-themed party every year with that guy around. And yes, if anyone deserves to be using Paper, it’s you. You could actually, you know, do something valuable with it!

Verity August 9, 2013, 6:34 am

Oh my god – so funny – So Funny!
Love your kids word choices. Love Paper.
Not loving the boy – that is disturbing….
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Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:28 am

Haha! We’ll laugh about it even more next summer.

Andrea August 9, 2013, 6:40 am

So the art project didn’t happen to be a truck? I can only imagine the giggles today. Maybe I should charge up my ipad and get me some paper!!!!
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Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:27 am

Oh man. A truck? Can you imagine? Like some sort of story telling dream.

Cheryl S. August 9, 2013, 6:47 am

I love this story! And the cartoon kills me. I have an ipad and haven’t heard of paper…but will be downloading when I get home!

Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:26 am

Thanks dearest. Paper is wasting a ton of my time.

Alison August 9, 2013, 6:54 am

Awesome trucking story, Tammy!
(Paper sounds intriguing – must check it out)
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Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:25 am

Thanks Alison. Your day is coming! I’m sure you’ll have some good ones.

Andrea August 9, 2013, 7:53 am

Hilarious! Kids are so cute when they swear. Other people’s kids, that is. 🙂
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Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:25 am


Barb August 9, 2013, 8:09 am

Okay . . . I had to laugh at that one since when my son was little he had the same problem when it came to saying truck!! The first time he said truck in front of my mom I thought she was going to have a stroke!!

Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:24 am

Oh, the truck story. Newt was nice enough to tell that one to the hair dresser the other day.

Koalani Roberts-Fodor August 9, 2013, 8:27 pm

I think I’ll be back, you’re pretty darn funny! My son likes to just say “fucking” as his worst ever badness. When getting a time out this morning it was just him in a corner, “fucking, fucking mom, did you hear me say fucking.” It’s not funny. Except it is.
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Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:24 am

Thanks Koalani! Yeah, my kids, as you read, like to retell stories in order to “legally” say them. Because, you know, like you son — just reporting.

rachl August 10, 2013, 7:21 am

Ha! That is fantastic. The other day I spilled my coffee and dropped and f-bomb and my five year old said “oooh Mommy you said a bad word” My 7.5 year old responded “it’s okay, don’t you know that all grown ups get to say bad words?” Not sure if all do. But this one does. Waaay too much!

Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:18 am

Hey, sounds like you’ve taught them well!

Ginger August 10, 2013, 8:51 am

The only thing disturbing me is that people keep referring to the app as “paper” I am too old.. In my day paper was actually made from trees… Lol

Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:16 am

No, I hear ya. It makes me think of that scene in Wall-e with the book that the pilot couldn’t open.

Maxabella August 14, 2013, 8:58 pm

That’s too funny! I love it! Your cartoon was the perfect mechanism for getting the story across too.

My Badoo told her sister to get foxed yesterday. She actually said fox. I loved that. Sort of… x
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Tammy August 26, 2013, 10:14 am

Get foxed. That may have to be my new go-to.

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