Don’t Make Me Kick You in the Non-Existent Tailpipe

– Posted in: Cranky Tammy, Green Living, Worst Mom Rants

Dear Nissan,

Hi. It’s Tammy. Here in Nevada. Where you haven’t released the Leaf yet. I’m on your waiting list. Probably near the top. You may recall that you said I’d have my car by the end of last year.

I understand that you want your roll-out of the first mass-produced electric vehicle to be a success. I get that you don’t want a bunch of inept electricians botching the installation of charging stations and uneducated consumers misusing the battery system. I see how you want this whole thing to look smooth and convenient and glitch-free.

But here’s the thing — you need to stop sending me cute frickin’ emails with catchy little commercials about how gas is wrecking the planet. ‘Cause guess what? I can’t do a damn thing about it if you don’t get me my car. So as much as I think your ad guys did a bang up job on this latest campaign about “What if everything ran on gas?” with the guy revving up his computer and the lady blowing hair dryer exhaust in her husband’s face, it’s no good to me. And it just kind of pisses me off.

So keep your suburb-walking polar bear and your emails to yourself, and do what I always tell my kids to do. Take some of that energy you’re using to dance and jump around so you can get my attention, and put it toward making sure all your toys in the right places. That will make me much, much happier.

5 Comments… add one

XLMIC June 12, 2011, 4:32 am

You are too much! I love this! :) Hope you get your car super soon :)

alexandra June 12, 2011, 5:13 am

I have been thinking the same thing.

I shout back, "tell me what to do then!!!"

PartlySunny June 12, 2011, 7:12 am

I don't even think I'll be able to get the stupid thing. We ended up having to buy the Honda Civic hybrid (which I like, don't get me wrong) because we needed a new car, so now we probably won't get another new car until the kids start driving. Which is fine since that's when the Leaf will most likely be out!

PartlySunny June 12, 2011, 7:16 am

They're pissing off the wrong people. Because you and I have some serious influence (well, you do anyway). They have no idea how much trouble we can cause them.

Wombat Central June 12, 2011, 6:57 pm

Bahaha! Never seen that ad before. And, yes, where the hell IS that car? *tap, tap, tap*

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