If You Give a Housewife a Cookie

– Posted in: Children's Books, Cleaning, Okay That's Funny, Uncategorized, Worst Mom Randomness

My good friend, Ginger, who blogs over at Spicey Mom, wrote this on her Facebook page the other day. A hundred bucks says this is how those If you Give a Mouse a Cookie people came up with the idea. Because I don’t know about you guys, but this happens to me at least five times a day. You can read more of Ginger’s contributions to the World’s Worst Moms cause here.

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If you give a Housewife a new silverware basket for her dishwasher, she’ll go to put away dishes.

When she goes to put away dishes, she’ll notice how grungy the silverware drawer is, so she’ll clean it, spilling water all over the floor.

As she’s mopping the floor, she’ll realize she can’t get some of the crud out of the corners, so she’ll grab the vacuum.

As she’s vacuuming, the dog will begin to attack the vacuum. She’ll fight off the dog as she decides the carpets could use a good vacuuming, too.

As she’s moving the dog’s crate, she’ll notice he has eaten a whole new box of 48 crayons. This will make her think that the dog’s poop will look like Unicorn poop.

Thinking of poop will make her realize she should attempt to pick up dog poop. As she is getting on her boots and gloves and hat, she’ll realize the dog needs to be walked.

After she walks the dog, she’ll get him a cookie and see the silverware still on the counter that needs to be put away.

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9 Comments… add one

pbe56 January 2, 2013, 11:22 pm

Can I just say: heavy, heavy sigh.

Tammy January 3, 2013, 2:46 pm

Yes, it’s like being in some sick never ending story.

molly January 3, 2013, 4:09 am

Oddly familiar! I call that kind of housework “the invisible cleaning” because no one sees it but it’s important.

Andrea January 3, 2013, 6:04 am

Huh. I thought all cleaning was invisible. :)
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Tammy January 3, 2013, 2:47 pm

Yeah, in my house, gnomes do it. At least that’s who gets the credit.

andrea-maybe it's just me January 3, 2013, 2:48 pm

Ah yes, the mouse and cookie epidemic! That is why it takes 45 minutes to put away a hairbrush!

Tammy January 30, 2013, 9:58 pm

OMG. This happens to me every day when I put away the hairbrush after getting the kids off to school…

Alexandra January 4, 2013, 8:46 am

Oh, yes, SO PERFECT.

Needs to be a book before someone steals this idea…

Tammy January 30, 2013, 9:57 pm

That’s the truth.

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